Dwell in possibility....

Reading the Book of Esther.  Finding myself newly and utterly amazed at the series of coincidences in her life.

Yes, yes - a.k.a. God's timing. 

Looking forward to Heaven where God will show me how that kind of thing was playing out in my life too. 

Signed,
Blynd 4 nouh

I used to blog daily, or if I was really really busy, then every other day.  Many days I found I had to pick and choose between all the great stuff I wanted to share with my supposed readers.   Ahhh - rich times indeed.  ....  But recently I noticed - and grudgingly accepted the fact - that I was blogging a mere once per month.  (uh-oh)   I thought about that.  Acknowledged reality.  Accepted a simpler life.  Moved on. 

Okay.  Monthly.  You can do it, Bev.

But somehow, the entire month of November came and went without me reporting in!  (sad face)   It's not that I didn't try.  I started several times.  Really I did.  (hrrmmph)  I think the main problem is that when you blog daily, you feel like any little tidbit or insight is worthy of the blog.  Surely someone will find the subject of pink duct tape to be interesting!  It's like a daily journal.  Maybe even a daily paper - The Denver Post.  But when you blog monthly (or even less), suddenly it seems as if you need to write something weighty.  Something worthy.  Something significant.  More like a novel.  Something akin to a New York Times bestseller.  And most days I'm quite certain I don't have anything even close to that caliber within me, even though the ideas are brewing deep down inside and are begging belligerently to be set free!

My songwriting life has run into the same snag.  When I was writing every single day - and most days a robust three hours a day (happy face!) - I didn't worry so much about what was coming out of me.  Oh sure, I still wanted every song to turn out the best it could be.  But if it didn't?  Well, there was always tomorrow.  ....  But these days I have less time to write, or network, or educate myself.  I'm in a chaotic season which I hope, pray and trust is transitional, but I'm in it nonetheless.  And as a songwriter, it's easy to think that from now on every single note or lyric must be FABULOUS.  There's no time for anything less!  (Any songwriters out there who might be reading this know full well that this is not realistic.  Perhaps you're even guffawing.  Go ahead.  I deserve it.)

If nothing else, I find that I now absolutely cherish those days when I do get to write.  I also find myself supremely grateful for the relationships God has allowed me to develop, and the opportunities He has sent my way.  Praying and trusting for more to come.

Songwriters sometimes like to say, "Go write a hit!!"  No pressure, eh?  ...   Let's try this instead:  Will I write a novel the next time I sit down to create?  Not likely.  But a daily newspaper column?  Perhaps.  A letter to the editor?  I guess that would be better than nothing.  Regardless, I intend to write something I feel passionate about that day.  Pure and simple.  Stay focused and "in the moment".  Never take it for granted.  And....I will never ever give up!  Why?  Because God won't let me!  His grip has turned out to be gorilla strong, and I couldn't wrestle free even if I wanted to.  

My new battle cry is a variation on "Go write a hit" - but infinitely more achievable for me these days.  "GO WRITE SOMETHING!"

Tonight that "something" was a simple blog.

Signed,
Aye Didd Itt!

I'm headed to the Durango Songwriters EXPO this weekend - which, inexplicably, is no longer held in Durango.  I know exactly one person who will be there, and I can legitimately only call her an "acquaintance".  The songwriting contest happens ahead of time, so I already know I didn't win (although the head guy was kind enough to take time to email me and tell me my songs were in the final screening process - and then a few days later told me I had broken the top 25).   I'll take it.

Networking.  My favorite.  Circling the room like a lioness stalking some antelope.  Then moving in for the kill - I mean - some conversation.  And never ever approach a group of 2 - only if there are 3 or more.  Etc.  These are the kinds of "tips" circling in my brain.  I may or may not pay any attention to them, however!  ....  Mostly I prefer the advice to simply "be friendly".

This quote seems appropriate:   "You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face."  - Eleanor Roosevelt

Signed,
K - Heer Goze

Ace.  The Helpful Place.  We even have pink duct tape.

Don't get me started....

Signed,
Stiep Lur Ning Kervv

These days I'm especially thankful for last month's GMA win.  That "bright spot" keeps me believing.  Keeps me dwelling in possibility.  Keeps me focused on the future.  Definitely easier some days than others....

My husband and I closed on an Ace Hardware store on Aug. 26.  I suspected the ensuing days would wreak havoc w/ my writing schedule.  Amen to THAT!  But there's still absolutely NO question in my mind that "writing" is what I'm meant to do.  I may have to take a break for a bit, but I WILL be back!  And in the meantime, I do what I can.  I write down ideas constantly.  I listen to the radio critically when I'm in the car - noticing what I like and don't like - analyzing why that's the case - and brainstorming about the next song.  I listen enthusiastically - even desperately - when my teenager wants to play a song for me.  I find myself distracted by the store's background music (today it was Taylor Swift, one of my favorites) when I'm supposed to be paying attention to the accounting software training my husband and I are going through.  I've mourned the fact that I'll miss WAJ this year (because of our first Ace Hardware convention as owners), but I registered for the Durango Songwriters EXPO in its place.  Today I sent off one of my favorite tween songs to 3 teenage girls - one in New York, one in Pennsylvania, and one in Australia.  I still faithfully read American Songwriter Magazine over my Frosted Shredded Wheat.  I actually chatted about songwriting the other day with an Ace customer, who kept coming back to find me and ask more about "which comes first - the melody or the lyric?"  I daydream about a new Ace jingle.  (Crazy, I know.)  And believe it or not, blogging is part of my "songwriting maintenance" as well...regardless of how creative or intriguing it turns out to be (or turns out NOT to be).  It may not happen as often as I'd like.  It may be less than inspired.  But I'm still here.

Here's the thing.  I'm not writing right now...and yet...I am.  "Writing" is more than working on a melody or lyric.  "Writing" is a lifestyle.  A mindset.  An identify.  A worldview. 

I am a songwriter.  I will always be a songwriter.  For now...I'm working on staying alive.

Signed,
Know Tearneen Bakk